Im asking everyone that reads this to please pray for our family.
Several things are going on and we simply feel overwhelmed.
For one...Bella. Her anxiety is getting worse and she is actually praying for Bravery during bedtime prayers. A simple thing like tutoring after school has sent her into tears. She is anxious about the family being without her, she is anxious about being at school later than usual, she is anxious with her routine being messed up and anxious about us not being there in time to pick her up. Of course its on my chemo days that she has tutoring and I can never guarantee if I will be home on time. She was crying her eyes out this morning as she left for school and this simply shouldn't be happening to her. Im so mad that she has to deal with this. We are out of money, we are paying for EVERYTHING out of pocket as we are simply drowning. We can't afford her counseling and I shake my head in anger at this whole thing.
Second...Isaac. He is on medication and his Rx is due. $180.00 on top of everything else. We are having to make decisions on which child to pay for, and again, this isn't fair.
Third...Me. Last week Chemo knocked me down for 3 days. On the 4th, I was totally fine. I was weak, fatigue and nautious. I thought I had the flu but it wasn't. I am not sure why its treating me this way, but its not good for my mind and my spirit and it just frustrates me. Each week I react differently and I can't pin point the reason.
Finally, our family in general. This of course is weighing on us and we are just trusting in the Lord that all this need will be provided for. I didn't ask for these cards. They were dealt to me. I could easily lie and get insurance but I choose not to do that. That is not what defines me. I want to do things in the Image of Christ and I hold onto his promise.
Please keep us in your prayers. Paying for the cost of chemo and the effects it has on our kids is more than we can handle. We simply need the presence of God to overwhelm us and the peace that only He can offer.
Thank you for supporting me and my family through this journey that (at this moment) sucks.