Friday, October 21, 2011

Update on Bella

First, I just want to say thank you to everyone that has been praying for Bella.

If you are not on Facebook or just haven't been following, I wanted to give you an update on why we were even requesting prayer.

Over the past year, Bella has become withdrawn from family and friends. Her anxiety has been rising each day and she becomes very distressed in situations that she is not comfortable with.

I put it aside trying to justify why she is feeling the way she is feeling. "Well I had cancer, and of course she is anxious" however she got worse and when we started noticing that she wouldn't go over her friends houses or even family, we knew that it wasn't just going to "go away".

Recently I got a call from her teacher and the anxiety is taking over at school as well also noticing that each time she did have "butterflies in her belly" she broke out in this rash. This is when we knew we had to take action and call on the doctor.

We saw her pediatrician and she has a type of eczema that is caused by stress. We talked awhile about the changes in the house and her actions and our doctor referred us to a play therapist.

Bella saw the therapist for the first time yesterday. She is great and we really like her and her plan of action. We met for 30 minutes then she played with Bella for 30. Next time Bella will have the full hour. The tears finally came running down my face as I knew this was serious for Bella.

I felt a sense of frustration from this whole thing because I had my counseling. I am on the road of recovering emotionally from this terrible disease and I have found things in my life that are making me happy so that I am not obsessing over Cancer 24/7.

A year later as I am on the road to healing, my baby girl, is just starting to mourn. That frustrates me that this had to happen. She is so tender, so soft hearted and she is full of love. She puts out a ray of sunshine (in my book) and for her to get so sick and break out from stress at the age of 7, a year after I have been diagnosed, puts a whole new frustration on Cancer. I hate it.

As the therapist and I talked through this, she made me realize (after being in denial) that Bella is afraid that I will die. She can not see that I am healing. She still sees me on chemo and she saw everything I went through. Sometimes I can't even see the light at the age of 32. Can you imagine the mind of a 7 year old?

After talking about the way she is with me and her obsessiveness with art, we were able to pinpoint some things that will help the healing process.

Bella has to go weekly which as you can imagine is a huge strain on us financially. This week alone we paid over $180.00 just for Bella not including my medical costs and it will be $70.00 each week. This thing about having no insurance really sucks. Plain and simple. We are barely keeping her head above water with our daily bills let alone medical bills and have exhausted all resources.

We are asking for you to pray for Cory and his job. We are pleading with God for the Hospital to call soon so that our finances can get headed in the right direction and we can have some INSURANCE!!!!!!

We know that Bella is a priority and we know that God will take care of her and the cost of the therapy. We are trusting that this will all soon come to an end and we can live without the stress of medical costs.

Thank you for posting sweet notes of encouragement and text messages. We are surrounded by amazing people and we Give God all the Glory for all things that are done. Thank you for being the hands and feet of God.

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