Saturday, September 4, 2010

Day 32 "Let me introduce you to KiKi"

When you find out that you have cancer most of the responses are "I have someone I want you to meet." I literally had a list going of phone #'s of women that have went through this and could be a benefit to talk to. One of the biggest problems was finding someone that was in my age range with small children. As I started to make my list my husband came home and said "Hey, one of the doctors I work with has a friend who is going through breast cancer too, I have her blog, do you want it?" My initial response was to roll my eyes and say "ok". I never checked out her blog and Cory came home the next day asking if I read her blog. I told him that I didn't and I am just not ready to meet anyone yet. But he told me that he started to read it and that he thinks it will be good for me. GO CORY! BECAUSE HE WAS RIGHT.

So I opened my laptop and typed in I was INSTANTLY hooked. Why? Because her opening blogs were a mirror image of mine. She was within 10 years of my age, she has two smaller children than myself, married, long blonde hair, tall thin and beautiful and I was drawn to her posts. Her posts immediatley hit home. I was so pumped and I told my friend Amy this. "I promise you, I will meet her, and will have coffee with her."

So I sent her a message on her blog, letting her know of my situation. She didn't respond back and I was kind of dissapointed but I figured she was going through her "bad" days of chemo so I gave it a week. I come to find out later that her dad passed away and she had to fly back to be there. When she got back, she immediatly emailed me back. I was SO EXCITED. We chatted through email a few times and then we set a date. I was so nervous to meet her. Not only because I felt an instant connection but I was afraid to see what I would look like.

My sister and I went to starbucks on Friday to meet Kiki (Her real name is Kristin). I went to the bathroom and when I came out I noticed that my sister was talking to someone. I looked harder and there she was. Tall, beautiful, full of life, bald with a darling hat and smiling like I never seen before. I rushed out there and we both embraced eachother as if we haven't seen eachother in years but have known eachother for years. It was instant and I am SO THANKFUL that God has put her in my life because He knows that I need her. Need her advice, her knowledge, her fears, her happiness and her reality of it all.

We chatted for 2 hours. I asked everything I could think of. I had such a headache when we left because my adrenailine was pumped and my brain was racing. I know that this is the start of a new friendship.

I don't want to repeat everything that we talked because I want to respect her, but I will tell you this. She was diagnosed in April and she is still scared, she is still insecure BUT she is so full of life, she is confident already that she is a survivor and she wants to use her story to help others that are going through it.

She is my new friend. :) She might not live close and we might not talk everyday but we share something that I have never shared with another person. Breast Cancer. We will walk the same walk and fight the same fight. I am honored to know her, and to know that she will be there through some dark times.

Yesterday KiKi gave me hope. I got to see a real live cancer patient. Not from the movies, not from the magazines, not from a doctors prespective but a real live human being facing the challenges that I will be facing. They may be different at times, only God knows, but my hope is that I shine like she does, regardless of the dark battle I have to endure.

Thank you KiKi!

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